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19 pages 38 minutes read

Who Understands Me but Me

Fiction | Poem | Adult | Published in 1990

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Background

Historical Context: Prison and Solitary Confinement

In the 1970s, America began incarcerating people at a higher rate than ever before. This was caused by the government’s changing policy on drugs—the self-titled “war on drugs”—which mandated longer prison sentences for those caught possessing, distributing, or using illegal substances. The result was increased incarceration for minor offenses, affecting people of color disproportionately, and more and more African American and Latino men were sentenced to lengthy prison sentences as a result.

Baca was one of the men of color affected by these efforts. He was living in Yuma, Arizona, in the early 1970s, running a marijuana distribution network, which brought him substantial income. One night, police raided the home of a heroin dealer that Baca happened to be visiting. An officer was shot during the raid, and Baca, though not the shooter or one of the targets of the raid, was caught up in the arrests. He was sentenced to five years in prison, where he was meant to work as part of his sentence.

Baca refused to work, insisting instead that he be allowed to go to school. The guards put him in solitary confinement for his insubordination. Solitary confinement has become increasingly common in prisons over the years and is widely considered an inhumane form of punishment for prisoners.

Originally, it was the Quakers, or Circle of Friends, who started using solitary confinement in the United States. They did not invent the practice but borrowed it from other religious leaders, considering it more humane than physical torture or the death penalty. The idea behind solitary confinement is that those who are removed from others, alone with a Bible and their thoughts, will have an opportunity for self-reflection, inner-development, and spiritual growth. The term penitentiary comes from the word penance, which is a spiritual practice wherein a person who has committed a crime atones for their actions.

However, Quakers today argue that solitary confinement is no longer an acceptable form of rehabilitation. They point to the research psychologists have done to suggest how harmful isolation can be to human development, and advocate for more humane treatment in prisons today.

Baca’s description of his experiences in “Who Understands Me but Me” represents an ideal experience of solitary confinement that aligns with the original intent of the Quakers: that a person use their isolation for inner redemption. At the same time, Baca’s poem depicts a society that, far from trying to help him grow as a person, is bent on degrading him further. The voices around the speaker tell him that he is “beastly” (Line 8). The speaker of the poem does not grow as a person due to their influence, but rather because of his own inner journey toward self-understanding. It is not because of the other voices, but rather in spite of them that the speaker of Baca’s poem is able to listen to his own voice and to find all the parts of himself, which he considers “beautiful,” and which he finds will pledge their loyalty to him (Lines 37, 38).

The speaker uses his confinement to discover self-esteem and self-love, which he had not known in the outside world. Most prisoners do not have such an experience, but instead report coming out of solitary confinement with greater psychological problems than they had going in. Baca speaks of the way he was changed in confinement because he had books to read and paper with which to write. His time alone was spent in useful activity. He now runs a non-profit that brings poetry and writing workshops to people still incarcerated.

Authorial Context: Baca’s Other Poems

Baca is known for his writings on social justice. His earlier work draws extensively on his own autobiographical material. His novel in verse, Martin & Meditations on the South Valley, explicitly draws on his incarceration experiences. “Who Understands Me but Me” is an example of this kind of autobiographical writing, which helped him break out on the literary scene.

Baca’s work also concerns itself with marginalized voices from the Chicano and Indigenous American community, particularly those who come from the Southwest. He writes a number of poems in the persona of those who experience trauma, degradation, and injustice due to the color of their skin. Another of his well-known pieces, which gives its title to his first book, is “Immigrants in Our Own Land,” written from the point of view of a collective immigrant voice, depicting their hope for a better life in the United States. Though they arrive legally and work hard, they are consistently thwarted in their efforts to gain financial security, dignity, and respect. Earlier immigrants look tired and hopeless in comparison to the newer immigrants, foreshadowing the inevitable disappointment the new immigrants will encounter in the new land. The title, “Immigrants in Our Own Land,” references the fact that many southwestern states of the US once belonged to Mexico and, before that, to the Indigenous Americans who inhabited the region. It points to the irony and injustice of the fact that those of Mexican and Indigenous American descent need to immigrate to the US in order to live on the land that once belonged to them. These immigrants are then treated as outsiders and inferior by the European descendants who drove them out.

Though Baca’s work focuses on difficult subjects, his work is often infused with hope, tenderness, and a sense of wanting to uplift the reader. His poem, “I am Offering this Poem,” declares that he offers poetry to readers in place of food, lodging, or material possessions because it is all he has. The speaker says the poem will warm and nourish the reader. It communicates that he loves them, which is “all anyone needs to live, / and to go on living inside” (Lines 25-26). Much like “Who Understands Me but Me,” “I am Offering this Poem” depicts a person stripped of material possession and power. He has nothing but himself. Whereas “Who Understands Me but Me” depicts a man on a quest to relate to himself in a more loving way, “I am Offering this Poem” expresses the speaker’s desire to connect with others. Both can be found in his first book.

Baca is intensely interested in using his voice to uplift others. He founded the organization Cedar Tree as a way to promote poetry and literacy in prisons while inspiring at-risk youth. Baca’s concern for social justice and advocacy for a better world is apparent in all of his written work.

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