What If It's Us

The narrative shifts to the other boy’s perspective. His name is Ben, and he is frustrated that he didn’t mail the “breakup box” (19). He also thought Arthur was cute but naive.

He gets on the train to see his childhood friend Dylan. He tries to throw away the box but can’t bring himself. He broke up with his ex, Hudson, but “it still feels like he really ended things” (20) because he kissed someone else.

Ben is tired, especially because he had to get up at seven that morning to go to summer school. Dylan is not surprised that he is still carrying the breakup box, and he comforts Ben.

Ben also thinks about their former friend group. It was made up of Ben, Dylan, Hudson, and Harriett. Harriett and Dylan started dating and left to hang out together. While their friends were dating, Ben and Hudson began their relationship. Eventually, both couples split up.

While they play video games, Dylan confesses that he met a girl who works at a coffee shop. Dylan thinks she now only wants him to drink coffee from her shop. Having a lot of t-shirts from coffee shops, he puts them in the drawer at his apartment reserved for when Ben stays over. Dylan also has a drawer at Ben’s apartment.

Still mourning the end of his relationship, Ben is jealous of Dylan’s new love interest. He also worries that Dylan won’t make time for him once he starts seeing his new girlfriend more regularly. Dylan then asks why he didn’t mail the breakup box. Ben admits that he wanted to give it to Hudson at summer school to get closure. As he recounts his day, he also mentions Arthur, and Dylan suggests that he should pursue Arthur.

Ben leaves, almost forgetting the breakup box after discussing Arthur. At home, Ben ruminates on Hudson, thinking about how everything had been good until Hudson’s parents divorced.

He opens his computer and begins working on his short story, The Wicked Wizard War. He has characters based on himself (Ben-Jamin) and Hudson (Hudsonien), and he considers killing off Hudson’s character. However, he stops himself. Then, he checks Hudson’s Instagram, which has a new selfie posted with the hashtag #MovingOn. Hudson used to tell Ben that Ben’s “expectations are too huge and that [he] sometimes dream[s] too far” (37). Still, Ben wants someone who wants to be with him forever. Then, he starts thinking about Arthur and tries to find him on social media. However, he has no luck and thinks he’ll never see the other boy again.

The next day, Arthur texts Jessie about Ben’s ripped shipping label, which reads “Hudson.” He is still unsure of Ben’s name and doesn’t know if Hudson is the boy he spoke to the previous afternoon or if he’s the ex. Ethan compliments him for talking to a cute stranger. Arthur thinks it’s weird since Ethan hasn’t responded to his texts sent outside the group chat.

Getting off of the subway, Arthur goes to his mother’s office, passing the doorman who calls him “Doctor” because his last name is Seuss. He finds one of the associates, Namrata, with a pile of files. He greets the other, Juliet, and then explains how he met Ben. Namrata suggests that he post something on Craigslist under Missed Connections. Embarrassed, Arthur changes the subject back to work.

On the way to class, Ben talks to Dylan over FaceTime. Dylan hasn’t gotten a response to his texts from Samantha, his new love interest. They had talked the previous day for over two hours. Ben and Dylan hang up when Ben spots Hudson and Harriett sitting on the school’s front steps. He tries to talk to Hudson but doesn’t get much of a response. Hudson goes inside, and Harriett makes it clear that she’s on Hudson’s side, not Ben’s.

Ben struggles in school, and taking summer chemistry is no help. He feels lost in the real world and would rather be in the worlds of his stories. When the teacher asks Hudson to stay after class the first day, he refuses, insisting he knows the basics. However, when the teacher quizzes him, it’s clear that he doesn’t know the answers. Ben tries to help, but Hudson quickly rebukes him.

Arthur regrets not getting Ben’s number. He has never had a boyfriend or kissed anyone. When he returns to his uncle’s apartment, he finds his father, Michael, sitting in his room. Recently laid off from his job as a web developer, Arthur has heard his parents arguing about his dad’s unproductive job search. Not wanting to discuss that, Arthur asks his father for his opinion on Craigslist’s Missed Connections and explains about Ben. His dad thinks he should post a Missed Connection and begins typing, but Arthur’s mother, Mara, returns and quickly vetoes the idea. They start bickering, and Arthur exits the room, upset since he’s not used to his parents fighting.

Ben wishes he felt more Puerto Rican in the world as he does at home. In middle school, people told him he couldn’t be Puerto Rican because he passes for white. His dad, however, appears to be more Puerto Rican. At home, when he cooks sofrito and other Puerto Rican dishes, his heritage is on display.

His parents notice that Ben seems off, quickly guessing that it concerns Hudson. Being Catholic, they say grace, and then they debrief the day. His father, Diego, suggests that he can fight Hudson if he needs to. Then, his mother asks about his novel. Ben says it’s hard for him to write since his laptop overheats every 20 minutes. His mother says that he might be able to get a new laptop from Craigslist if he makes it through summer school.

Diego then mentions that someone he works with found his girlfriend on Craigslist through the Missed Connection page. Instantly, he wonders if Arthur posted something there. When he checks, however, there’s nothing there.

On July 11, Mara wakes Arthur at 8:00am, telling him to get ready for work so he isn’t late. In the car, he can tell from her body language that she wants to talk, and sure enough, she asks about Ben. Their conversation is interrupted when she gets a call from work.

Arthur looks out the window, still amazed that people seem “underwhelmed. By New York!” (75). He imagined the city as it appeared in musicals, which makes him think of Ethan. He texts his friend in a private chat but gets no response.

However, the next day, Ethan sends a picture of him and Jessie to the group chat, saying they miss him. He knows that if he were back home, they’d be trying to figure out a plan to find the boy from the post office, who Arthur still thinks is named Hudson.

At work, Namrata receives a package, and Arthur bothers her until she opens it and discovers that Arthur bought four pounds of candy corn for her as a gesture of goodwill and friendship. She and Juliet invite him to lunch, where he learns that Namrata has a boyfriend, and Juliet is biromantic asexual and has a girlfriend.

While they’re at Panera, someone calls an order for Hudson. Namrata and Juliet push Arthur to see if it’s his Hudson. When Namrata talks to him, she learns that the boy’s last name is Robinson, and while Arthur confirms that it’s not “Box Boy,” they start to wonder if maybe it’s his ex. Arthur types “Hudson Robinson” into an internet search bar.

Despite being frustrated from seeing Hudson and Harriett pal around at summer school, Ben agrees to meet Samantha and Dylan at the coffee shop where she works. They order, and Dylan gives her flowers. When she gets off work, Dylan mentions that Ben is in summer school, a fact that Ben wants to keep to himself. Soon, Samantha asks how Ben is doing after his break-up, and Ben knows that Dylan chose to talk about Ben’s relationship instead of his own history, especially since he typically moves on quickly from one girl to the next.

As Dylan and Samantha make plans for the next day, Ben points out that it will be Friday the 13th, and he and Dylan always watch scary movies. He invites Samantha to join, and Dylan suggests he brings a guy. Ben briefly considers asking out a cute boy from the coffee shop until he sees the boy’s girlfriend come over and kiss him. Dylan then brings up Arthur, and Samantha volunteers to help Ben find him. When Ben struggles to recount what he knows about Arthur, Dylan teases him about summer school again.

Samantha promises to look for Arthur and then goes back to work. Dylan calls her his “future wife” and quickly realizes it freaks Samantha out.

Arthur is furious because all Google searches of “Hudson Robinson” turn up results about the marriage of Kate Hudson and Chris Robinson. Then, he receives a FaceTime call from Ethan, which he accepts. The screen fills with the faces of Jessie and Ethan. Arthur explains what’s happening in the hunt for Hudson. Jessie momentarily steps out of the camera, and the conversation with Ethan turns awkward. When she returns, she thinks she may have found Hudson since she found an account that tweeted about wanting a sandwich right before Arthur saw him at Panera. She gives him Hudson’s handle before the call ends. Arthur finds the account on Instagram, realizing that this person is indeed the boy he saw at Panera. He finds a comment from Harriett saying that Hudson will be fine without “him,” making it clear that he recently went through a breakup.

Clicking over to Harriett’s Instagram, he finally finds a picture of Ben, but he isn’t tagged. Then, he remembers Ben wearing a t-shirt from a local coffee shop called Dream & Bean and decides to look it up in case he works there. He plans to go the next day and hang a short message on the bulletin board offering his contact information.

Ben and Dylan leave Dream & Bean discussing Samantha, who calls Dylan. However, she wants to talk to Ben, thinking she might have found Arthur. She sends him a link to a meetup for incoming Yale freshmen happening that evening in Central Park.

Dylan is disappointed that she didn’t want to talk to him but thinks they should go. He gives Ben a pep talk, saying that it might be the universe giving him a second chance. At the mixer, Dylan convinces him to talk to a guy he finds attractive named Kent. He quickly discovers that Kent is Puerto Rican, and Ben says it’s hard for him because people always assume he’s white. However, Kent replies, “I bet no one is asking you if you got into Yale to meet some sort of diversity quota. That actually sucks” (124). Feeling embarrassed, he exits the conversation, finds Dylan, and convinces him to go home. He feels like it was a waste of time, and he doesn’t belong there. Being around the Yale students makes him feel like he doesn’t know what his future holds.

The next day, Friday, July 13, Ben watches Harriett and Hudson interact before school and accidentally photobombs their selfie. Afterward, he goes to Dream & Bean to find Dylan. Ben still feels down, having realized how much he wants to find Arthur. Dylan is worried because he still hasn’t heard from Samantha, and Ben is secretly relieved, feeling like when Dylan is in a relationship, Ben matters less. Ben looks at the shop’s bulletin board, sees his face on the memo from Arthur, and realizes that Arthur is looking for him too.

When they return to Dylan’s apartment, he sends Arthur a quick message with the subject line: “Is this for real?” (132).

Arthur’s phone keeps buzzing, having gotten many replies to his poster, many wishing him luck in his search. Arthur’s dad tries to distract him, but then he opens the email from Ben. He is amazed but worried that someone is pulling a prank on him. He and Ben exchange several emails before Ben gives him his phone number. Arthur calls, and they each confirm they’re the person the other was looking for.

Ben compliments Arthur’s eyes and then asks him for coffee. Then Arthur suggests going to Coney Island, wanting it to be extra special. Hearing Ben’s surprise, he suggests that Ben pick, reeling when he realizes he’s finally going on a date with a boy. Ben tells him to meet him outside the subway at Times Square.

Arthur resolves not to mess this up.